I was held hostage in Tijuana (sort of)

If you have ever gone to Tijuana for some hanky-panky, you already know it’s the begging capital of the world, everyone from the homeless to the handicapped, mentally ill and all the dope addicted zombies will beg you for some spare change, it’s unreal but its reality. 

This isn’t a real big issue for me as sometimes I give a dollar, & sometimes I don’t, though I prefer not to give because soon afterward they will take your kindness for weakness if you are just giving them money too freely. 

With all this being said, there is a more sinister type of individual you must look out for beyond the beggars and it’s the age old “hustler” commonly a Mexican deportee who speaks pretty good English and has been sent back to Mexico for some type of criminal violation committed back in the States.   

I had the unfortunate opportunity of meeting such a guy, yayy me (sarcasm), so thus the encounter all started after I had tried my debit card multiple times on the atm at the entrance of a strip club to no avail it doesn’t work, so I left disappointed that I wasn’t going to get any “lady cakes for the night”( lady cakes=sex in my psycho mind  lol)

 So I decide to walk home to my hotel which was 10 minutes from The Strip Club I was at, three steps in the journey MR. Hola greets me and says hello bro what are you looking for ? An I’m like oh nothing I’m just going home for the night, he’s insisting to me he can show me around an find a girl for me, I refuse once again, by saying no thanks I’ve been there done that for the night.  

Incredibly somehow he quickly persuades me into conversating with him as we are by this time walking and talking for about  5 minutes I begin to lose track of where I was going and when I realized he was leading me into the opposite direction of my hotel , I kindly noted to him hey guy, I’ll get back with you some other time, which made him reply to me by saying I want to show you where you can exchange money for free, it’s really better than all the other places and you will be able to get better prices with the chicas, so like an idiot I’m curious about this cool little secret money exchange center. 

I proceed to follow him for another 5 mins or so, altogether we had been walking for a good 20 minutes and I was completely lost as now we were in the non-tourist section of Tijuana  an area where the locals go about their daily lives thus dawning on me I’m now on his territory as I’ve removed myself far from the safety of the tourism center and on top of that its starting to get really late at night around midnight or so an that definitely didn’t help the situation at all and just added to my confusion and despair. 

The fella feeds me tall tale after tall tale telling me how his God Father owns one of the biggest strip joints in town , which comes off quite sketchy making me wonder to myself, why does it feel like this guy is trying to hustle me?,though never the less  we  continue walking making a few stops in between on our journey, the  first of which was to ask a lady working at a cornerstore restaurant the current Mexican/US currency exchange  rate was? After she tells him he says  ok now let’s go to my family’s pharmacy where there is an exchange center in the back, 

At this point I’m like I really don’t give 2 or even 1 FUCKS anymore, let’s just get the currency exchanged so I can go home and get to sleep,but his energy started to change once he asked me “how much money do you have on you” uhhhh ohhhh Mr. Hola apparently forgot the scammer code book’s rule #1 which is to know how much money you can steal before you try stealing it,

so I opened my wallet and counted in front him , because by this point I really didn’t give a flying shit if something bad was going to happen to me, $30 bucks even I say to him, while explaining that , the purpose of me coming out that night was to go to the atm to withdraw money and that’s why I was where I was when we first met. 

MR. Hola starts telling me that the bank placed a block on my card and I Should call and have that removed so I can get more money, (NO SHIT SHIRLOCK) I say to him yup good idea I’ll do that tomorrow. 

The scariest part of it all. 

We finally make it to this weird looking place , which was like an outdoor mall with a staircase , extremely isolated away from the street and basically in an alley  in the middle of Tijuana, something just didn’t feel right about this, and that’s when the guy says to me stay here at the bottom of the stairs I’m going to go uphere and exchange the money for you,& I’m like wow! all of a sudden that we arrive here its now a secret location, and I cant follow in behind you? I oblige sitting at the bottom of the staircase, I wait for like 2 minutes when something inside of me said “RUN MOTHA FUCKA RUN, GET YO SHIT AND GO” so I listened to that voice in my head and started sprinting out of this place. 

I’m back on the street lost and on high alert I flagged down the first taxi I find and off  to my hotel , I was super nervous  perhaps the guy was in pursuit of me, maybe he was going to get more guys to torture and rob me some more, I didn’t and still to this day don’t know what this incident was all about, but when you don’t feel right about something, don’t second guess yourself and get the fuck to safety, Thankfully IM OK! – THE END!